tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5037107797013641705.post9162724722508233018..comments2024-03-26T05:15:39.663-07:00Comments on Equestrian Ink: Comfort and HorsesJami Davenporthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05259390150273030284noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5037107797013641705.post-43264454577166274872015-02-10T09:23:48.816-08:002015-02-10T09:23:48.816-08:00Thank you Venom. I feel for your loss. And I appre...Thank you Venom. I feel for your loss. And I appreciate your kind thoughts and words. <br /><br />Sarah, I have found the comfort of friends to be great help. Thank you.Laura Crumhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15200878892304748308noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5037107797013641705.post-85265738207756421472015-02-10T08:29:17.071-08:002015-02-10T08:29:17.071-08:00Venom, your comment about not knowing if you'd...Venom, your comment about not knowing if you'd ever be over it. I've dealt with a fair amount of death over the last 2 years and I keep coming back to the quote below. It's a chunk of dialogue from NCIS and it helps me.....some.<br /><br /><b>Lydia:</b> I'm sorry I'm no help.<br /><b>Ziva:</b> Don't be. What you're going through, I would wish on no one.<br /><b>Lydia:</b> You've been there?<br /><b>Ziva:</b> Loss is a part of life. But I would never claim to know exactly how you feel. You lost your father, I lost my siblings. But how we each respond is a very personal thing.<br /><b>Lydia:</b> Was it hard to get over?<br /><b>Ziva:</b> One gets over the loss of a wallet or a watch. But a loved one they never leave you. You never get over; you only get through.<br /><b>Lydia:</b> How?<br /><b>Ziva:</b> By leaning on others. The comfort of friends.<br />Sarah Bhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05810588784530212255noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5037107797013641705.post-59774879076134946642015-02-09T19:42:33.955-08:002015-02-09T19:42:33.955-08:00Dear Laura,
I hear you, & I think I can empath...Dear Laura,<br />I hear you, & I think I can empathize with you.<br /><br />I also lost the Great Love of my Life this past September. <br /><br />There hasn't been a single day yet go by that I haven't thought about him. <br />Some days he only crosses my mind a dozen times, those days are almost as light-hearted in comparison.<br /><br />On my dark days (3-4 times a week) I can hardly get him off my mind all day... <br />I go about all my chores carrying my deep sorrow like a millstone around my neck. I cry & I talk a steady stream out loud to him while I'm turning out horses, cleaning buckets, mucking stalls, setting out feed, and swiping at my tears with soggy mittens that smell of horse shit & sadness. <br /><br />I've heard it said that the human heart has infinite capacity for love. In my experience, it also has infinite capacity for grief. <br /><br />I do not know that I will <b>ever</b> be "over it", & nor do I wish to be. Because as much as I would be afraid to say it out loud, rightly or wrongly, I equate being over "it" to be too much like being over "him". I think maybe the best I'll be able to do is "get through it".<br />I can't even imagine letting go of him yet; he's dead & gone & I am set adrift. <br /><br /><br />Today I allowed myself only an hour to cry & dwell, and I told him that I really am trying to honour his memory... that each day I am trying to recognize, & reach out for, & trying to hold on to moments of happiness (when they come) for even just an instant longer. <br /><br />My Great Love gifted to me 3 very important things:<br />1. the precious knowledge that I was lucky enough to be the one Great Love of his life,<br />2. his example of eternal optimism (I've long worked to follow his example, and I will again someday, but not just now), and <br />3. horses in my life every single day. I'm so thankful to have 'his' last horse in my barn every night. <br />I swear that while I go about my daily chores I sometimes think I can hear snatches of him singing in the shedrow, & I can almost feel his breath on the back of my neck when his old mare snorts. <br /><br />The sound of that mares' wet & emphatic snort & the ghost of him that it carries for me, that's a moment of happiness I wish to hold onto forever. <br /><br />Best wishes Laura. Venomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03954234690814697536noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5037107797013641705.post-89621124353595218162015-02-07T10:46:02.987-08:002015-02-07T10:46:02.987-08:00Thank you, Val.Thank you, Val.Laura Crumhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15200878892304748308noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5037107797013641705.post-59612793930820322602015-02-07T05:47:47.936-08:002015-02-07T05:47:47.936-08:00My younger sister and only sibling passed away whe...My younger sister and only sibling passed away when I was 24. I was hit with an immovable sense of mortality. I felt that I could die at any moment. <br /><br />I am still thinking of you and your son. Thank you for continuing to connect with us. Valhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07335385366138424092noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5037107797013641705.post-7121908606725946852015-02-06T18:27:48.326-08:002015-02-06T18:27:48.326-08:00Thank you Stilllearning--you have always been a jo...Thank you Stilllearning--you have always been a joyLaura Crumhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15200878892304748308noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5037107797013641705.post-16188647230835451062015-02-05T22:41:03.631-08:002015-02-05T22:41:03.631-08:00This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12616149846804702026noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5037107797013641705.post-42452547119232236402015-02-05T12:36:09.886-08:002015-02-05T12:36:09.886-08:00Love is real, and so is the pain of losing a loved...Love is real, and so is the pain of losing a loved one.<br /><br />I wish I had better words to offer you. <br /><br />Hugs & prayers to you and yours.Stilllearninghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16563077467348752977noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5037107797013641705.post-41372325726547662042015-02-05T10:29:12.659-08:002015-02-05T10:29:12.659-08:00Thank you for three very lovely comments. I apprec...Thank you for three very lovely comments. I appreciated them very much. Love to all three of you.Laura Crumhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15200878892304748308noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5037107797013641705.post-65603357842988161482015-02-05T06:29:57.100-08:002015-02-05T06:29:57.100-08:00I confess I would be someone guilty of encouraging...I confess I would be someone guilty of encouraging those enduring strife to spend time with their horses. Not necessarily ride them, I think all that you typed, that you feed them 3 times a day, check them, smile once in a while, is hugely valid and valuable in a totally terrifying world where people absolutely can and be torn from us in a moment. There's a little bell tolling in fear within me at all times, knowing exactly how impermanent it all is. I completely hear you on seeing the ambivalence, ignorance, naivete, whatever it is that allows people to conduct themselves in a certain manner, leaving me both appalled and envious. Still, I think living with our eyes open to the harsh realities, and sowing and harvesting what beauty we can from it is all we can do. You don't have to be happy, or riding, or anything, except You, in pieces, dealing, and still needed by those who love you. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01344662726517478751noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5037107797013641705.post-48415140937679684642015-02-05T00:23:25.859-08:002015-02-05T00:23:25.859-08:00Sending you love, Laura. Sending you love, Laura. Francesca Prescotthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16312915602595615476noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5037107797013641705.post-88951148517233463132015-02-04T20:45:04.429-08:002015-02-04T20:45:04.429-08:00The world is not stable, and there are no guarante...The world is not stable, and there are no guarantees - of love, long life or comfort of any kind. But what there is, is the now of things - breathing in and out, seeing the trees move in the wind, and yes, the gaze and actions of horses.<br /><br />Nothing in this takes away any pain or loss - that is still there - and it isn't a consolation, either. It's just what is - our portion in life, good and bad. Sometimes just being there - even if it means feeling bad, or sad, or angry, or discouraged - is what there is.<br /><br />Sending best wishes to you.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com